Thursday, August 30, 2007

3 unfinished thoughts



(1)
this flower, i found it here in the garden, underneath the peonies that had blossomed in April. now it is August, and this flower, it isn't even a flower yet. it is just three hairy green leaves. "and how will you grow there, in the shade?", i say. the flower doesn't answer.
so i go buy a terracotta pot to plant her into, to move her to a sunnier spot. still i worry that it is too late already, that the year won't have enough sun left for the flower to finish its growth, that it will leave her unfinished, green, without

(2)
flowers. they are female here in Germany. die Blume. she flower. the opposite of flowers are trees. they are male. der Baum. he tree. and then there is the third

(3)
it happened years ago, in another city. it was summer, she's sure of that, as the heat was standing in the street, dense and vivid, even in the late evening. they sat outside, her and a colleague, drinking another drink, basically to postpone the moment of having to step into the hotel, into solid, temperature-filled space.
maybe it was the heat that melted the line between being colleagues and being friends, she still isn't sure of it. all she knows is that at one point, they were miles beyond small talk.
"there's this concept", her colleague said, her eyes suddenly all clear and open.
"or more something like a wish for life - to never

~~~

photo friday, challenge "unfinished"

Friday, August 10, 2007

summer crossing



it's August, and i am wearing a sweater and socks. this is Germany, Middle of Europe, it really should be summer-ish here now, but temperatures are down in the cellar. and instead of sun, there is rain. and not just rain, but rainrainrain since Monday, to the point that rivers are starting to flood.

now the doorbell just rang. and i received a parcel from an online shop order. the nice thing is, they included a little inflatable gift. one that would be perfect for the season, theoretically. but now it looks both funny and sad: a blue water ball.

couldn't help it, had to take a photo of the ball, also because it oddly fits the book i am reading these days, a book that i brought from the library in the last week of July, assuming it would be the perfect read for the following month: Truman Capote's Summer Crossing.

~

photo friday, challenge "oddity"
listening to.. a band called AIR
reading.. stories in six sentences

Wednesday, August 08, 2007

recent publications



august. sunflower petals carried away by green birds. rain drops falling like stars. old letters in a box, taking me back to Asia. white splashes of colour on my shoes. and - words in various sizes and shapes.

- 20 minutes in berlin (short story)

- renditions of her (poem)

- rave / transition / one / swallow / asleep (5 poems)

- Arriverci (short story)

the whole list, here.

~

reading: Truman Capote, Summer Crossing
listening to: REM, Around the Sun

Tuesday, August 07, 2007

drip drop



rain, the weathermen had promised. the clouds arrived in the night, yet they kept all the drops for themselves, for the sky, oblivious of the earth's dryness, of the news forecast.

at noon, she went outside, and opened the lid of the water tank. she looked up to the sky one more time, one last time. then she filled the bucket, and made the way through the garden, knowing from past experience that it would start to drizzle just 5 minutes after she finished.

and it did, for whatever reason.

~

photo friday, challenge: wet

Saturday, July 28, 2007

day / night



in the garden
the last of the day lilies faded
leaving emptiness & a stick of memory
a token of petals once opened then closed

like dreams tinted
with emotions, with hidden truths
revealing themselves in the night
then curling up before dawn

leaving awakeness & a hunch of the clarity
that hovers beyond this realm
of the human mind
called conscious,

this folly of evolutionatory
vagary

~

reading: Jay Rubin / Haruki Murakami and the Music of Words
rediscovering: Oasis / Born on a Different Cloud

Thursday, July 19, 2007

butterfly



my arms folded, i move my body
to the left, to the right
as far as i can reach

you don't breathe into
the dephts of your being
my teacher states gently

then asks a simple,
yet intricate question -
since when is that?

i open my arms
and feel like a butterfly
for a second

i was the tallest in class
i answer, drawing my
shoulders in to explain

the ways we make
our selfs small,
my teacher says,

softly, like the wind
she tries to make us feel,
inside of us.

~

Monday, July 09, 2007

a different place



between water and stone
i step into this thought

that a place
at a different time
is a different place

just like the same place
alone / with someone else
is a different place

~

a task for my week:

to step out of the trains
and chains of thought
every once in a while

to walk slower

to listen to the inner voice
of a place, a person,
a moment

to watch
the world news
empathically

~

Thursday, July 05, 2007

question of the day



is it me who is taming the garden -
or is it the garden who is taming me?

~

and the other question:
do the secondary petals of sunflowers,
the ones that develop not on top,
but along the stem,
always look like this?

and if so,
how come i never noticed it?

~

Thursday, June 28, 2007

three moments



(1)
out in the garden, trying to take a photo of this day lily named Siloam. hearing two birds cry, right above me. buzzards, i think. and look up. and there they are, floating in the wind, in wide, playful circles. and there i am, camera right in my hand.

(2)
at the desk, looking for a cupboard and a shelf for the cellar. opening pages, and seeing this sofa that just might fit into the living room. finding it also comes in the colour of sand, and is named - tylösand. going there, to the furniture house, to test the sand. and buying a small carpet that will match that sand, and that makes the wooden floor of the living room feel like a jetty.

(3)
in the web, browsing pages. being greated by a zen poem named the Art of Peace. and wondering how often i am just a step away from the sky, from the sand, from the peace.

The Art of Peace begins with you.
Work on yourself and your
Appointed task in the Art of Peace.
Everyone has a spirit that
Can be refined, a body that
Can be trained in some manner,
A suitable path to follow.
You are here for no other purpose than
To realize your inner divinity and
Manifest your innate enlightenment.
Foster peace in your own life and
Then apply the Art to all that you encounter.

- Morehei Ueshiba

Monday, June 18, 2007

growth



monday and this thought
that time, like plants,

grows steadily
in a combination

of expected circles and
spontaneous sprouts

- photo friday, challenge "active"

Friday, June 15, 2007

black soul cat

  • acoustic :: soul
  • sanity :: sleep
  • mambo :: black
  • session :: ended
  • hound :: dog
  • cat :: place
  • coward :: cowgirl
  • trunk :: drunk
  • hold me :: tonight
  • psychological :: walk

-unconscious mutterings, week 227

Tuesday, June 12, 2007

tranquility



a path a stone
music fading voices

floating signs that point out
the dedicated way

i climb across the wood
that forms the reiling

i take 12 steps
and breathe in

tranquility

~

- photo friday, challenge: purity

Wednesday, June 06, 2007

sometimes



sometimes the blue sky
is waiting in

the right lower corner
just beyond

the block of the
larger view

- photo friday, challenge: "large"

Tuesday, June 05, 2007

5 things are waiting to be done

5 things are waiting to be done. that was a riddle a friend sent in December. and the state i seem to be in since weeks. or rather: since years. looking at to-do lists from the past months, i see that those 5 things are changing, though. which must mean that i am moving forward, right?

and looking back, it usually aren't the ones that were on top of the list that made the difference in the end. sometimes i feel, somewhere in the back of my mind there is a little neutronic net that knows very well what to do next, and what to leave waiting. only that it doesn't communicate in rational reasons to my consciousness. it communicates in whims and moods of the moment, making me feel like following follies instead of priorities.

2 more thoughts on this, or rather, quotes:

the goal i have: to never be finished - nie fertig werden.
that's what someone quoted to me years ago in Cologne, a wish for her life.

the more you do, the more you can do.
a modern day koan, sent from a san fran friend.

~

and then this, stumbled upon in the web, just at the right time:

I will not die an unlived life.
I will not live in fear of falling or catching fire.
I choose to inhabit my days, to allow my living to open me, to make me less afraid, more accessible, to loosen my heart until it becomes a wing, a torch, a promise.

I choose to risk my significance, to live so that which came to me as seed goes on to the next as blossom, and so that which came to me as blossom goes on as fruit.

- Dawna Markova


Monday, June 04, 2007

alles lyrik



in between politics and finances
a whole feature of poetry
six pages long

starting with an editorial explanation
why this issue sees no other literal reviews
than lines in not even rhymes

adding, just in case of unknownness,
a cautious introduction into the nature of lyric:
poems aren't things, it states

poems are emotional states,
existing only while reading their lines,

neither before, nor after

ending with a soothing note
for all those who rather read novel size reviews:
those will appear in an extra-long-feature, next issue.

~

Wednesday, May 30, 2007

beyond instinctive rain

  • dancer :: rain
  • intellectual :: death
  • direct :: call
  • tolerate :: difference
  • post :: modern
  • instinctive :: move
  • brink :: beyond
  • regain :: shape
  • repulsed :: impulse
  • distressed :: dreaming
- unconscious mutterings, week 225

Saturday, May 19, 2007

amber



amber is a colour
she learned on that rainy thursday morning
yet skipped looking for it
sure it would be far.

then found it
just an hour later
some metres from the doorstep
in the rain.

- photo friday, challenge: "amber"

Friday, May 18, 2007

road unplugged

film :: cannes
dragon :: bird
hunger :: fridge
plucked :: unplugged
dissolving :: into petals
executive :: board
mist :: may
minority :: butterflies
map :: road

- unconscious mutterings, week 223

Monday, April 30, 2007

about butterfly



about butterfly borders
contempt easter
first good garden

life living mine
photo pain peek
poem peace struggle

still travels time
unconscious trees
writer world write

writing your zeit

~

text: oil on copper zoom cloud 30.04.
photo: July 2006
dictionary peek: "zeit": german for "time"

Thursday, April 12, 2007

cutback / backcut



cutback / backcut

a home can be
a rounded piece of wood
in a cut back tree

i undertand as i sit
with my teacher
in a garden

that dates back to the time
when gardens where cut in sizes
large enough

to provide food
for people, to give
shelter for birds,

to encompass
the circle
of life.

~~

Rückschnitt / Fortschritt

ein zurückgeschnitter Baum
kann Raum genug sein
für ein rundes Heim aus Holz

verstehe ich als ich dort sitze,
mit meiner Lehrerin
in einem Garten

der aus der Zeit stammt,
in der Gärtenstücke groß genug
geschnitten wurden

um Nahrung anzubauen,
um Unterschlupf zu finden

um den Kreis des Lebens
zu umschließen.

~~

photo: 11. April
poem: 12 /30